He became one with the ocean

As the sun set we walked into the ocean together. Sam, my dad, my mum and I. Our hands were cupped tightly.

As we all bent down and sunk our hands into the water we released him.

On his fourth birthday I watched his ashes leave my hands and it was then that he finally became one with the ocean.

Butterfly Giveaway Winners

The winners are


Paula
For Mary Lynn

and

Katie Allan Stahl
For Jack

Congratulations ladies! Please send me an email at carlymariedudley@gmail.com and I will email you your butterflies.

Love and peace to everyone,

Lost Memories

I wonder how old you really are. How old we all really are.

Today I found your name in your Grandfather's dictionary. It is such an old looking book. Discoloured and faded. It was printed in 1964. 18 years before I was born, 43 years before you were born. This dictionary was printed before I was even a thought in my parents minds.

I wonder if our spirits existed together then and somehow in our transition to earth we lost our memories of each other.

You are now the most beautiful memory for me. Know that I could never forget you.

Child Spirits

I wonder what they all like. Funny, naughty, cheeky, placid, quiet, artistic? Sometimes I truly feel like I can sense or even just tell what a little child's personality or spirit is like by the way the waves form around their name. I absolutely believe each child plays a part in having their name written in the sand. I am sorry if that upsets anyone who believes that their is no life after death. I have just seen too many magical things happen in my short lifetime to ever believe that their is no life after death :)

So the other night I was drawing at the beach. I wanted to draw a fairy butterfly for Emma. I am not kidding you, I drew this butterfly about 14 times before I could get the photograph of it for Emma's mother. Each time I started drawing, something would happen to prevent me from drawing it. The waves came in, a seabird ran through the butterfly, a bee started hovering around me, a dog came over and ran his paw prints right next her butterfly. You name it, it probably happened. So I decided that I would leave Emma's butterfly and start drawing my pure spirit butterfly for her brother Chase. It took only the one drawing and the one photograph to capture Chase's butterfly. There were no waves, no bees, nothing, just stillness.

So I went back to start drawing Emma's butterfly. This time when I tried to draw it all of these seashells revealed themselves that had been hiding underneath the surface of the sand. It sounds beautiful, and actually they were pretty little shells, but boy did they make a mess of her butterfly! So I was like "Now Miss Emma, you are quite cheeky aren't you?!" "So gorgeous girl, I really want to give this photo to your Mama to make her smile so do you think you could help me draw this butterfly for her? I will even write your name on it?" After I said this, the sea calmed down, the birds, bee and dog were no where to be seen and I was able to draw Emma's Fairy butterfly and take a photograph of it for her beautiful mother.

I wonder if Chase is a quiet young man. A peaceful spirit maybe. I believe Emma is quite the little party girl with a spirit full of adventure.

If you have ever been waiting to have your childs name written by me at the beach and it has been sitting at the top of my wait list for some time it is simply that I have had a interesting time at the beach trying to capture your their name in a photograph :)

The Pure Spirit Beach Butterfly Giveaway

So this is my latest Beach Butterfly design. The Pure Spirit Butterfly.

I thought it would be so sweet to have the childs name as the body of the butterfly. Whilst I imagine my boy riding on the wings of butterflies I know so many people see their children as butterflies. I think it turned out so lovely.

My next challenge... The Fairy Butterfly!

So I am giving one away :) If you would like to enter this giveaway please leave me a comment on here or on facebook with your choice of name/s for the butterfly.

Good luck everyone :)

Love and peace,

2011 - Finding Myself Again

When Christian died I lost myself. It was like I died too. The person that I had grown into was gone. I was left stripped bare of my life.

Before Christian died I believe I was quite the spiritual person. I prayed to God often. I would have daily rituals of reading positive affirmations in the morning to help me through out my day. I believed in Angels and that I had them around me and my daughter always. I remember whispering into Scarlett's ear each night as I kissed her good night that her Angels were watching over her.

I felt a deep connection to the earth. I remember I would be in awe of the smallest of beauties such as a tiny flower or the golden web of an orb weaver spider. I would play beautiful music through out my day. I would read books, cook more, I would spend more time relaxing and finding moments to just be still.

When Christian died it was like somebody pulled my soul from my body and told me to start again. I was vulnerable and desperate for guidance and support. I got onto a boat where I found comfort, but without going into details and hurting others feelings after a while that comfort did not feel right. My deepest beliefs were different.

I felt washed out and exhausted. I forgot myself. I lost my sight for beauty. I let go of my angels. I stopped whispering in Scarlett's ear each night. I prayed to God, but my prayers no longer had any truth or heart to them.

Over time I got off that boat and I am slowly finding parts of myself that I had forgotten. This new year I am giving and dedicating to myself. Hah! I know how selfish! I am going to find myself again. Not just parts of me but my whole self, and then I am going to build on that.

I feel this deep calling to help others through the most devastating time of their lives. And if I want to be able to help anyone I have to have helped myself first. My spirit needs to be energized and full of life. God gave us all beautiful souls and we deserve to let them shine.


I have the most amazing year ahead of me. And I am only excited about it. My prayer and hope is that if you have lost a part of your beautiful self, that you find your way back to you this year too.

For The Broken Hearted

I had the honour of photographing my beautiful neighbours son’s baptism yesterday. For my own reasons I have not been to church in a long while. As I entered the church, flickering lights caught my eye. A lady was lighting a candle. She stood there for a few minutes in prayer.

Each of these candles represents a prayer, a worried heart, a faithful heart, a sorrowful heart. I lit a candle for all of our broken hearts. My prayer was for peace. For all walking this road of grief.

What a beautiful act... to light a candle for somebody else.

Pearls, starfish, seashells and a beach party!

Since Christian died I have been searching for the perfect candle for him. One that we can light for an hour on his birthday each year. It may have taken me 3 years and 11 months but I found it and it is just that... perfect.

This year we are having a party for Christian. Yeah so what is he is not here to celebrate it, my kid is awesome and we are going to have a party to celebrate his awesomeness!

Christian's birthday falls on Australia Day which is totally cool as it means there will always be a public holiday and even cooler FIREWORKS! So this year we are having a party down at the beach and everyone is welcome to join us for a picnic dinner at sunset.

We will light his candle for the first time at his beach under the sunset and star filled sky on his 4th birthday.

For the first time in 4 years I am looking forward to this day.

Christmas Day Winner and 10 Runners Up

And the winner is....

Suzanne Kuuse

Susanne, congratulations! Please send me an email at carlymariedudley@gmail.com so I can organize your prize with you.

Now the 10 Runners up for a Gallery Butterfly or CarlyMarie image of their choice are...

Paula

Rebecca McVey

Michael Norris

Sarah Stout

Becky Johnston Tamosaitis

Ames

Gina Fiorini Toothe

Jessica Beauseigneur

Mary Carmickle Thompson

Congratulations Runners Up! Please send me an email with the image you would like along with the name/s you would like placed within your image.



To everyone who entered any of my 25 giveaways and did not win a prize the image above is for you. Please feel free to copy and paste the image to your own computer/facebook page.

You will need to double click the image before copying it.

Wishing you all love, peace and hope.

CarlyMarie's Personalized Photograph Gallery

All of the images below are available for $25 AUS

Each image must be personalized with your choice of name/s. The photograph will be emailed to in a high resolution jpeg format to the email address you provide in paypal. You will receive your image within one working day of your purchase.

You can purchase your image/s at the top of the right hand side bar.

All images are available without wording at CarlyMarie's Photographic Gallery

Thank you for your support! All funds raised from these images go in to running our babylost projects.

You can visit them all at The Grief Effect


Sweet Heart Reflection


Little Visitors
(Double click on the image to enlarge it)



Little Friend
(Double click on the image to enlarge it)



Sweet Heart's Beach


The Seashore Of Remembrance

Candle Light Beach


The Sea Of Hearts

Sun Heart Reflection


Summer Dreaming


Twilight


To visit CarlyMarie's Butterfly Beach Gallery please click on any of the butterflies above

Christmas Day Giveaway

This is my final Christmas Giveaway. The Christmas Day giveaway. Oh dear... how late am I? I know... It is New Years Eve! That is me fashionably late... okay maybe just really late.

For our last Giveaway we are giving away...


A Year Of The Babylost Calendar


A personalized Beach Butterfly


A Gallery Beach Butterfly Of Your Choice


A CarlyMarie Image Personalized With The Name/s Of Your Choice


A Christmas Tree In The Sand For Next Year


A Name In The Sand Photograph


And A Beach Gift Pack Containing Some Sand And Seashells From The Childrens Beach


If you win this giveaway you win all of the above :)

We will be giving away some gallery and beach butterflies for runners up.

To enter this last giveaway make sure you are a reader (Follower) but I hate that word! on my blog or come and 'like' me on facebook! Leave a comment below on here or on my facebook page to enter the giveaway.

Good Luck everybody!

Christmas Eve Winner

The winner is

Shell Reid

Congratulations Shell! Please if you could send me an email at carlymariedudley@gmail.com so that I can get your postal address to send you the pendent!

Thank you to everyone who went a supported my love friend Sue... and thank you Sue for donating this gorgeous little Butterfly!

23rd Day Of Christmas Winner

Lindsay Bell
(For Eden)

Congratulations! Please email me at carlymariedudley@gmail.com so that I can email you Eden's Summer Dreaming image.

Thank you to everyone who entered!

Christmas Eve Giveaway

For the night of Christmas Eve we are not giving anything away... BUT our sweetest friend ever is!

Sue is literally an earth angel and I like to think of her as one of my partners in crime!

Sue takes finger prints from people who have passed away so that she can place their prints into silver for families who are missing them. She has done this for babies as young as 13 weeks gestation all the way up until old age. I don't know how she does it. So much sadness to endure each day. She does it though because she has a calling to. Sue first contacted me when she found my website. She placed some of Christian's ashes into a silver seashell pendent for me. What a treasure this woman is to me.

Sue is giving away this sweet silver butterfly pendent.


Isn't it gorgeous!

If you would like to enter this giveaway please go an "like" Sue-Ella Signatures on facebook! Tell her she is amazing - because she really is!

If you do not have a facebook account please still go and have a look at her page!

After you have done that come back and leave me a comment on here or on my facebook page.

Good Luck everyone!

23rd Day Of Christmas Giveaway

For the 23rd Day of Christmas we are giving away a Summer Dreaming Image.

If you win this giveaway you will be able to choose the name/s for your image. We will email you it in a high res jpeg format.

To enter the giveaway please leave me a comment on here or on Facebook with the name/s you would choose for the photograph.

Good luck everyone!