In our circumstances Scarlett was under the age of 2 when we lost Christian. She did not understand what had happened. All she saw were that things had changed and that her parents were upset. We did our best to keep to our normal routine and made extra time to show her she was loved and safe.
If your child is over the age of 2 they might understand more than you realize. It is okay to speak to them about what has happened. Allow your child to express their grief and tell them that whatever they are feeling is okay and that they can talk to you about it. If you are concerned about them never hesitate to seek professional help.
We are currently in the process of explaing Christian's death to Scarlett. It can be done in such a gentle way.
There are some fantastic books available that help explain death to a child. Some of these are listed below. They have been recommend by Babylost parents from all over the world.
Waterbugs and Dragonflies
The Dragonfly Door
When Dinosaurs Die
Someone Came Before You
We Were Gonna Have A Baby But We Had An Angel Instead